"That other part of me"

She's always there looking at me, smiling

Her negative comments are there, always piling

Without a break, she tries to push me down

She's the upper hand, she's got the invisible crown
She's the better image of me in their minds
Her 'perfectness' is so shining it blinds

The imaginary me is taking over

They state that they see me,

though the truth is; they only see the cover

In their hearts and minds that person is all they want to see

In their eyes there's not a single part of the real me

Their expectations start to grow higher...

...as the impatient part of me is catching on an invisible fire

For this fire to break through is nothing I desire..

"You won't fail", please don't be such a liar

I'm not even allowed to let out a small, almost unheard, scream...

Don't you know?

I want to be in this world knowing I got someone, somewhere... in MY team.

.... I seriously can't take it anymore... I cried yesterday...

...so... mom told me I could skip the Thai lesson tomorrow.. and told me to stop doing that pile of homework. It felt like a big stone just fell off my chest (lol). But I can't keep going on like this.. I mean... escaping... I have to face it someday. -.-

...but for now... just let me escape for a bit....